29 March 2014

I Still CAN Believe It

"Where did my baby go?"

"Oh, they grow up so fast! Sniff sniff."

"He's xx months today, and I'm NOT okay with it!"

I have lots of friends who are also mothers, and phrases like these are about half their social media statuses.

But not mine. I wrote a post back when Cora was 7 months old about how time wasn't going fast or slow and how I was totally okay with that.

I just read it again, and it's still true. I don't wonder where my baby went. Yes, we want ANOTHER baby, but I don't want it to be Cora. Cora is 2 (26 months, if you're the technical type) and gets more hilarious and interesting every single day. I don't find motherhood some huge enduring challenge that warrants wishing we could just go back to sitting on a couch nursing all day. Or lamenting that it goes by "so fast." I don't think it happens slowly, but I don't think like, "I blinked, and then she was grown up." I've always been the practical one. (Seriously, our priest even said how practical we both were during our wedding.)

Maybe I just lucked out with Cora. We rarely have discipline problems, to the point where she's still not completely clear on the concept of time-out. She whines for stuff until I remind her to use her manners, then her whole demeanor changes. (The word "please" pretty much forces you to smile, no?) She listens to authority. She poops in the potty. She has an amazingly consistent routine that she thrives on. She says "bless you" after someone sneezes and does a pretty good sign of the cross. Perhaps this is just the calm before the storm (a.k.a. "the terrible 3's" that I've heard ALL about).
You know what you can't do with a 3-month-old?
Put her to work, that's what!
Or maybe I'm like this because we're letting God plan our family. (We have never used any contraception, ever.) I know we're not confining ourselves to "2 and done" or whatever, and we'll be listening to God on how big our family will be. I have about 10 years of fertility left (possibly more, possibly less--who knows but God himself?), and I have no idea what God has in store for us. But I sure am excited! Maybe any type of "sniff sniff, I miss him as a baby" feelings are in actuality a prodding from God to TTC? Just a thought. Perhaps when I'm 45ish and God lets us know for sure that we're done, I will feel the twinge of missing my kids as babies. However, for now I'm happy with my child getting older, even if she turns out to be our only one.

Yes, I've heard the saying, "The days are long, but the years are short." My response to that? Days are 24 hours long, and years are 365.25 days. And that's exactly what they feel like to me.
You know what else you can't do with a 3-month-old?
Listen to her squeals of delight as you sled really fast down a big hill, that's what.

2 comments:

  1. Yes! Exactly! I yearn to hold a baby but it's a desire for another baby not for Lucia to be a baby again. I've enjoyed all the stages so far and I think I will continue to. I actually love teenagers (wanted to be a HS teacher!) so not dreading that either!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Cora sounds like such a joy! :) I think one of the reasons that the days felt so long to me is because I had my kids within 28 months - my oldest was 28 months old when my third was born, and my son was in between them. We also let God control our fertility, and He decided to give us three really close together. I'm not sure it was a "God doesn't give you more than you can handle thing" or pushing me past that point to rely on Him more fully. Either way, our kids are such a joy! I look around the table each night at dinner and marvel at who sits at our table and how they grow. While I look back fondly on when they were little and sometimes wax nostalgic, I don't yearn to have another baby. I look forward to the adventures our family will have as we all grow together. :)

    ReplyDelete